On Monday morning, the cows broke into Rose’s garden and trampled her gorgeous garlic plants.
She was heartbroken. I helped her carefully reposition the salvageable stalks and remove the broken tops for use in the kitchen, and was filled with deep compassion as I watched her tears mingle with soil and plant. Afterwards, we sat in the sunroom watching the gentle rain and discussed the deep epiphany that came to Rose as she was mending her broken plants. It was profound and moved us both to tears as we felt the beauty of closeness sweep over us. She had connected with Mother earth and the soil and the broken plants had opened her heart to a breakthrough in our relationship. Out of brokenness sprang renewal.
Rose and I have been going through a period of deep transformation in our relationship.
We have experienced incredible growth and progress both as a couple and individually. It has been excruciating and exhilarating. We have been experiencing tremendous triumphs and massive setbacks, often within the same day. We have been spending countless hours passionately discussing and analyzing our innermost selves and the dynamics of our relationship. The growth and progress has been tremendous and has been net positive. We have been exploring concepts such as extreme positivity in our communication and mindsets. Embracing our conflicts as sources of growth. Learning to set aside our "needs" and focus on our desires. Striving to keep our words supportive and encouraging and avoiding manipulation and negativity. It has been transformative and powerful. We have been pushing each other to our limits until something breaks, and then sifting through the pieces to see what truths and lessons we can discover and assimilate into our friendship. Recently we have been focusing on the concept of embracing our conflicts and arguments as opportunities to grow and learn rather than shunning them as a source of pain or insult. This is, of course easier said than done. But we are making progress. We have found that completely letting go of the white-knuckled grip, and the tendency to impose our “needs” on each other, forces us into a zen-like state of abandon and release, and ultimately freedom. This practice holds the potential for intense beauty and power and love and generosity. It is terrifying, yet exhilarating. As petty insecurities form and jealous emotions rear their ugly heads, conflicts arise and things break. It is at the junctures of brokenness that we often find our deepest and most profound breakthroughs and epiphanies into ourselves and each other. And thus we find renewal even in the trampled gardens of our hearts.
Rose, the kids and I are eager to see you all on the Magic Meat Truck this weekend!